So I’m a college student now. I’ve heard “No” quite a few times in the past couple weeks. It’s not necessarily an angry thing. But I still hate it. I hate “No.” As an improvisor, I’ve learned how to say “yes,” and even “yes and.” I learned that humor doesn’t have to involve “no.” As an increasingly socially aware person, I am very sensitive to “No.” I want people to be free and explore and experiment and be themselves instead of being “No”-ed into a mold.
I participated in a phone bank for the Obama campaign. I called some 15-20 numbers and didn’t get a single positive response. New Hampshire residents have apparently been baraged with propaganda from both sides because their votes are so important. To these people picking up their phones, I was just another solicitor. They were not happy to hear from me. “Don’t call here with that crap.” “No, I don’t know who I’m voting for, but if I keep getting these calls I’ll know who I wont be voting for.”
I applied for funding for my trip to the Free Culture conference. I tried a few resources. I wrote a proposal. I got “No”s.
I took three placement exams. “No” advanced placement for any of them.
I tried out for the two campus improv groups. I was sure I was going to get in, until i saw how many other talented improvisors there were in my freshman class. “No.”
I really really hate “No.” I like “Yes.” I like “Yes you can.” Encouragement. “I think that what you are trying to do is extremely important and valuable, even if i can’t help you with it right now.”
I don’t take “No” well. It’s a character flaw. I get depressed and want to quit. I realize that I’ve been lucky to get a whole lot of “Yes” the last few years of my life. I don’t think there’s going to be as much “Yes” from here on out. I want to be on the forefront, making the change. So, in a way, I don’t really want “Yes.” I want to get right in there with all of the “No” and stand tall and fight.
I’m going to work with friends to start a new improv group. I’m going to the Free Culture Conference, even if I have to pay for my travel out of my own pocket. I’m going to kick ass in my intro-level courses and use my exta time to Get Things Done. I’ve registered to vote in New Hampshire, where my vote will really count, and I’ll make sure that all of my friends do the same. This is important stuff. I’m not going to let the “No” slow me down.
My strength can come from my self, not from receiving “Yes.”
